Remember the story where Jesus approaches a man in need of healing and asks him, “Do you want to get well?” (John 5:6) I used to think that was such a strange question. Of course he wants to get well! What invalid wouldn’t want to get well?
Yet one of the observations I’ve made in my consulting work, as well as in the coaching is do, is that a serious core issue is addressed precisely by that question: Do you want to get well? Are you willing to work on it? Do you really want things to change from the way they are now?
Often people are more interested in complaining than they are about actually taking the necessary steps to resolve what they’re dealing with. It’s a question of desire and actual willingness to change. People have to really want to get well and they have to be committed to taking the steps required to get there.
I’ve noticed this dynamic in the anger management class I teach. There are those who show up because they want to get well and there are those who are just logging their time because they figure it’s better than being in jail. That may sound like an extreme case, but you might be surprised how many people are approaching their life or their ministry in a way that’s not a whole lot different. They are content to be in pain, not willing about taking the steps to work on the problem. Sometimes that’s because they’d rather stick with what they know and are used to because it’s less fearful than the unknown of change.
Ask yourself: Do you want to get well?